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fordy269
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 49
Bisexual Female, 50
0 miles · Derbyshire
Forum
Sexlightened
01. What is your favorite word? Love
02. What is your least favorite word? Cunt
03 What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Good conversation
04. What turns you off? bad hygiene
05. What is your favorite curse word? F*ck
06. What sound or noise do you love? My phone ringing Lol
07. What sound or noise do you hate? finger nails down a chalk board
08. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Nurse, doctor or consultant
09. What profession would you not like to do? public toilet cleaner
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? Welcome, It's about time you got here.. you've been down there ages!
Mrs. F xx
Sexlightened
Hi Stevcouple,
There ARE genuine people on this site...
It takes time!
We have been members on this site for a year & a half & have met 6 single fems to date & a few cpls.
Just be patient, get to know people in the chatroom & dont expect meets to happen overnight & you will find what you are looking for.
Above all have fun!!!
Mrs.F xx
Mrs.F xx
Sexlightened
Bill rents an apartment in New York, and goes to the lobby to put his name on the group mailbox. While there, an attractive young lady comes out of the apartment next to the mailboxes wearing a robe. Bill smiles at the young girl and she strike up a conversation with him. As they talk, her robe slips open, and it quite obvious that she has nothing on under the robe. Poor Bill breaks out into a sweat trying to maintain eye contact. After a few minutes, she places her hand on his arm and says, "Let's go in my apartment, I hear someone coming..."
He follows her into the apartment, and after she closes the door, she leans against it allowing her robe to fall completely open. She purrs at him, "What would you say is my best feature?"
The flustered, embarrassed Bill stammers, clears his throat several times, and finally squeaks out, "Oh, it's got to be your ears!"
She's astounded! "Why my ears? Look at these boobs! They are full, don't sag, and they're all mine! My butt - it's firm doesn't sag, and has no cellulite! Look at this skin, no blemishes, or scars! Why in heaven's name would you say my ears are the best part of my body?!"
Clearing his throat once again, Bill stammers, "Outside when you said you heard someone coming? Well, that was me!!!"
:P :D
:P :D
Sexlightened
There was a husband and wife who decided to have children. The first born was a blonde female who was very pretty and grew up to be quite popular among friends and boys. At the age of 16 she was named "hottest girl on the planet."
The couple decided to have another child. Once again it was a female blonde who was pretty and very popular. And, at the age of 16 she was named the new "hottest girl on the planet."
Well, the Man and his wife decide to have one more child. At the birth of their baby boy the man walks in to his wife's room, takes one look at the baby and says, "Hey, how can that be our son? He is ugly!! He's not only ugly, he'll give our family a bad reputation!"
He then asked his wife, "Have you been fooling around behind my back?"
She replied -- "Well no, not this time!"
:P :D
:P :D
Sexlightened
Three guys are walking down the beach, when they see this beautiful woman laying naked on the beach.
The first guy goes over to her and starts making love to her, when she says, "What will we name the child?"
The guy freaks and runs away.
So the second guy goes over to her and starts doing his thing when she says, "What will we name the child?"
He freaks out also and runs away.
The third guy has been watching all this. So he puts on a condom and goes to do his thing. when she says, "What will we name the child?"
He ignores her and keeps on going. She keeps asking but he keeps going.
Finally he finishes and pulls off the condom, ties a knot in the end of the rubber and throws it in the ocean.
He turns to the girl and says, "If he gets out of that, we'll call him Houdini."
:P :D
:P :D
Sexlightened
Just wanted to say thanks to all those who have replied to this post & all those that sent us a PM,
Its been a fun packed year for us on this site & we will miss you all loads!!!
Thanks for all your words of encouragemant...
OH! & not forgetting all your email addys lol
we will be back so someone keep the bed warm for us lol
luv Mr & Mrs F xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sexlightened
We will be joining the ranks of the free members in a few days after we have decided to take a break for a while,
I've had a cancer scare & for a while (at least til we get the all clear) we will be consentrating on each other...
We have made some great mates on here, far too many to mention (& besides dont want to miss any one out lol)
So we just wanted to say bye for now to every one here, keep on having loads of fun! we've loved being part of this site & will miss you all!!
We will be back but just not sure when so dont forget us! lol...
Hugs 'n' kisses
Mrs.F xxx
Sexlightened
[I]jelandn said....[/I]
It appears that my proof reading is rubbish and I have been taken to task by Jel for poor grammar!! So here goes again!! Grumble, grumble!!
OOOhhhh....
jel can take me to task anytime!! 
And N, I love the way you can always make me giggle hun xxxxxxxxxxx
And N, I love the way you can always make me giggle hun xxxxxxxxxxx
Sexlightened
[I]RWB Said....[/I]
Fordy I can't decide which pic I like the most, the one of your bum with you wearing the red stockings knickers and basque, or the one of the cooked breakfasts...mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!!
mmmm...
Hard choice!!
But if you are ever brave enough to come up north....
Then you just wont have to make one...
you can have both!!
we are too chicken to come down south!!
