I was going to answer this and then thought against, as didnt want come to come back on site after a few days with a rant lol.
But i think you should look at these profiles True and you may notice the phrase Bi-female, may help you out a bit there with your answer. Alot of females get more than enough from there male partner, and want to add that little bit of the female touch into the situation..
As a single female i shouldnt realy answer for the couples, but just thought i would stick my bit into another single male rant.
xxxxx
When my husband and I joined this site, we didn't have "no single males" on our ad. After being a member for a few months we got a bit fed up with the attitude of some of the single men who apporoached us. A lot of them were only interested in trying to get me (Ellie) to meet them on my own and confessed that they would only be comfortable if Jay wasn't there. I understand why they might feel that way, but thats not we got into swinging for. We wanted to experience everything together and we knew that if we met with another couple they were more likely to be into it for the same reasons. Single girls are a in a monority here it seems and like has already been mentioned, a lot of ladies in couples are more keen to explore their Bi side than anything else.
We haven't ruled meeting a single bloke out completly though, would just prefer to look for them ourselves when we are ready.
xx
hello true,
thought i would say my bit on this,
when i was on as a cpl we did meet sgl males but on our profile we put we didnt as of all the twaty sgl males that think we would just shag anyone!!
i have met sgl males as a sgl fem and i am also starting to look into my bi side its hard for a cpl to decide who when an what they are after in a sgl male babes, we used to meet the same sgl guy as we felt at easy with him he knew our limits and what i liked an also what jim liked.
there is someone for everyone hun
hehe just read that again and thought i would add that jim wasnt bi lol nor was the sgl male we met lol
[quote user=truescorpio] Sure, Ive heard all the excuses 'single males are too pushy/unapproachable/possessive' but at the end of the day which ever way you choose to look at us, we are still an essential component of sex.
[/quote]
Sadly, True, a lot of SMs on this site (and others) ARE pushy/unapproachable/possessive, although I think the majority of us that participate in regular chat and take time to befriend people on here are above that description. Equally sadly, we are not an essential component of sex where a couple is concerned. Couples are perfectly free to decide that they want to stick to other couples, or maybe SFs. As CC says, a bi-SF can please both the male and female in a couple. As a straight SM I can't offer that particular service !
I share your frustration sometimes, but I've found that by chatting to couples and getting to know them well in chat, an awful lot actually ARE prepared to meet SMs that they know and trust - they just don't want to be killed in the rush of idiots looking for a quick shag (and little else) if they advertised for SMs in their profiles. To be honest, I can't say I blame them !
[color="darkred"]Sorry true but i've answered this same question hundreds of times in this forum and to be honest i can't be bothered to rant AGAIN!
So all I'm going to say is this - The couples in this site don't owe you anything. They're here to meet who they choose to meet.[/color]
I agree with Sudsy, as a single female I do get cheesed off with the mail from some single men who copy and paste a message to me. Is is annoying and proves I am just a shag to them. The single males I often meet are the ones who have gotten to know me and do not think that I should be grateful that I am able to meet them.
The single males I pay attention to are the ones in the chat room with their faces on cam and chatting to lots of people in a respectful way. So for me a cam,in the chat room,respect and politeness and a flirty nature make single guys get my attention rather than the ones who mail me saying "Hi, love your pics, would you like to meet up."
I also dont like men who constanly brag about how good they are and that I should rush to meet them as they are too good to be true.
Take Sudsy for instance if you dont mind Suds. I love to meet up with him and have done on several occasions. He is a lovely genuine guy who I dont see flashing his cock in the chat room( although I would certainly watch). He is kind,attentive and I love meeting up with him. To me that is more important than the sex with him (although is is fabbbbb Lol). He has a personality and isnt just a cock on cam. Give me men like him anyday xxxxxxx
[color="red"][/color]Have to agree with you there fruit!!! Sudsy and others are fab single males but we have to chat to them and get to know them.............People are people...there are some couples who are weird......
Morknmindy that was straight to the point lol.
Truscorpio we used to have NO SINGLE MALES on our profile because in the early days we where bombarded with whispers and bloody mail.
we have never ignored single males and always tried to be polite but some of them dont seem to get the message grrrrr. we have now removed the NO SINGLE MALES from our profile because over a period of time we have found that some of you single guys are great to chat too and thats all as far as meeting a single guy we would not rule this out but again that will be at our choosing and only after we have met socialy and built a frienship oh and you need to be at least 15 mile away lol.
and we agree with what sudsy and fruit say tmi fruit lol
lots of interesting stuff already said here.. just to add my 2p....
I have always felt that single guys are seen as the unpopular majority in swinger groups. I can see what they mean!!!! After being to a couple of clubs and been led by a sexy girl or two into a play room, it was sometimes annoying to become surrounded by single guys trying to grope the girls without asking or being asked.
It seems that this is where we get stereotyped, and I can definitely see the reason.
I can only hope that couples who do not object to an extra male or two don't give up sorting through the pushy and impatient ones, and I hope they find some that are rewarding.
Until then Mr True, don't let the single guy brats drag you to their level. The good couples will eventually find out that 'nice' guys DO come last!! :giggle:
[quote user=morkandmindy][color="darkred"]Sorry true but i've answered this same question hundreds of times in this forum and to be honest i can't be bothered to rant AGAIN!
So all I'm going to say is this - The couples in this site don't owe you anything. They're here to meet who they choose to meet.[/color][/quote]
Have to agree with that statement. Were just not looking for a single male, thats not our to try and discourage unwanted attention we state no single males in our profile not that it works but hey hoo. Please respect peoples wishes I say.
[color="darkred"]Ok Mork may not want to rant but I do!
It was meeting with single males that got us into swinging. It wasn't until later that we realised meeting with couples may be more fun (the math is easy!)
To this date we have still had more meets with single guys than we have with couples.
[b]I[/b] prefer having another female present becuase [b]I[/b] enjoy, on occasion, experimenting. And it's been brilliant everytime.
In fact I completely applaud the male halves of the couples in here. You try and sit next to someone you love, in a chatroom, while a bunch of horney blokes bombard them with sleeze?!
[quote user=truescorpio]I always thought swinging was meant to be a mutual venture, but to be honest with half the profiles I see it always appears to me like the male in the couple is just after another ego rub.[/quote]
So basically all the male halves of couples on this site are selfish gits?
I may be wrong but I don't think an ego boost is what our partners are here for!
[quote user=truescorpio]Now Im not gonna tar everyone with the same brush here, but my understanding of swinging is that it helps couples stay together [/quote]
And in our experience we have found that couples having problems who use swinging as a solution tend to get into difficulties. I think you'll find the majority of couples in this site have incredibly strong relationships. which is how they can "mutually" enjoy a lifestyle like this.
[quote user=truescorpio]but at the end of the day which ever way you choose to look at us, we are still an essential component of sex.[/quote]
We've been here long enough to know that that's not true! lol
The fact is you have just demonstrated the exact attitude that has put us off meeting single guys!
[quote user=truescorpio]I just wonder how many couples are really being honest with themselves about why they do this?[/quote]
I think you'll find it's most of us! [/color]
[quote user=truescorpio]You misunderstand me Mindy, I never said for one second that single males are OWED anything, my arguement was that I am sick of the attitude toward us as a whole.
[/quote]
[color="darkred"]Yep. We know how you feel![/color]
[quote user=truescorpio] Nature blesses us with the organs required to perform penetration - and the reason penetration is pleasurable (performed correctly of course) is, obviously, because it is a natural thing to do. Therefore I stand by my original statement - men are an essential component of sex
[/quote]
[color="darkred"]I completely disagree with that! But if it is true how is an [b]extra[/b] man an essential component?? [/color]
[quote user=truescorpio] Wth regards to my 'attitude', it is apparent that you find a man who asserts himself to be threatening? I suppose we'd have more success if we sat quietly up a corner yes?[/quote]
[color="darkred"]Actually I find confidence and assertiveness in a man really attractive.
Arrogance on the other hand is a massive turn off.
And you view women as a set of sockets.. I rest my case.[/color]
True - sorry mate, but it looks to me as if you're just digging a deeper and deeper hole for yourself here. No matter how stronlgy you seem to feel about this subject, it seems equally clear that almost everybody else disagrees!
If it were me, I'd take that as a sign to go and quietly make some friends in the chatroom
[quote user=ellie_n_jay]When my husband and I joined this site, we didn't have "no single males" on our ad. After being a member for a few months we got a bit fed up with the attitude of some of the single men who apporoached us. A lot of them were only interested in trying to get me (Ellie) to meet them on my own and confessed that they would only be comfortable if Jay wasn't there. I understand why they might feel that way, but thats not we got into swinging for. We wanted to experience everything together and we knew that if we met with another couple they were more likely to be into it for the same reasons. Single girls are a in a monority here it seems and like has already been mentioned, a lot of ladies in couples are more keen to explore their Bi side than anything else.
We haven't ruled meeting a single bloke out completly though, would just prefer to look for them ourselves when we are ready.
xx[/quote]
You see thats the problem. Moronic single guys making a bad name for the rest of us single guys. They dont understand that a couple comes with 2 people in the package and not just your favourite one.
Couples on here need to get to know single guys on an individual basis because were not all bad people with a brain of a humping dog.
here here sudsy. and as for you thinking i have a problem with you true, i find this far from the truth. I dont have a prob with you, never had done, as you dont cause me any harm. Im not interested so therefore i dont let you bother me. Although in saying that your attitutde can sometimes be up your own arse in the chatroom, like when you say........"im bored now, can someone who hasnt spoke to me talk to me now"..............and ................."are there any nice looking single females who want to chat".
maybe this is why you dont seem to get very far, remember single females talk to each other far more than you probably think. and as with couples, piss one half of the couple off you piss them both off.
bye for now
xxxx
Hi
I don't normally post on these forums but read this one with interest. We are a straight couple, I feel in a massive minority on this site myself as I'm not a bi female and I'm not gonna pretend to be just to please my husband. I love men, and we have met a three or four lovley single males on this site, they are charming, great sense of humour, respectful and fun. We have had a meet with two of them and had a lovley time, both me and Mr SM-PD thoroughly enjoyed it. Equally we have been approached by a lot of minging single males as well but we have just sifted out the three or four great ones from the naff ones. Playing with single males has been a great way for me to dip my toe in the water so to speak, we are looking to meet couples as well but so far found it really hard to find a couple we are both drawn to but are getting somewhere at last. So I just wanted to stick up for some of the fantastic single males out there!
[quote user=miss_ccrider]here here sudsy. and as for you thinking i have a problem with you true, i find this far from the truth. I dont have a prob with you, never had done, as you dont cause me any harm. Im not interested so therefore i dont let you bother me. Although in saying that your attitutde can sometimes be up your own arse in the chatroom, like when you say........"im bored now, can someone who hasnt spoke to me talk to me now"..............and ................."are there any nice looking single females who want to chat".
maybe this is why you dont seem to get very far, remember single females talk to each other far more than you probably think. and as with couples, piss one half of the couple off you piss them both off.
bye for now
xxxx[/quote]
[color="cyan"]You said it all miss_cc and as for you true just read your own comments above, do you really need to ask why you don't have much success ??[/color]
[color="cyan"]Dont think you are shut out based purely upon your sex. You don't suppose that you often being rude, arrogant and sometimes bloody offensive has anything to do with it ??[/color]
Interesting thread.
As a single male, i can honestly say that a couple stating "No Single Males" doesn't bother me in the slightest!?! Whatever floats your boat...
There are however the occasional couples who treat single males like pieces of meat! lol Now that wouldn't usually bother me, as i quite likes to be used, but when the husband starts treating me like they're doing me a favour.... Please! :grin:
Oh this is fun, NOT.
We decided to swing for no good reason at all !! And it doesnt have to help us stay together, we're on our 19th year true, we've already proved we can do that... we had talked about it and found it exciting, as it is, and planned guidelines.
I knew i could sleep with a man so we went for single male first, we were his first meet and he ours, it was absolutely hilarious and sexy hot hot hot lol
so next we met a single female, who opened doors for me ... and then a couple.
Now after all this we meet who we damn please single married group or more
... and i'd love to see you tell chris he's selfish !
have you ever been in bed with a few women true, we're the selfish ones and we hog the bed and covers too.
And when you came into chat when you first joined, we did not give you ATTITUDE, we said hi like we always do. And when you'd done those changes to your profile, we read it like you asked and gave our opinion. If i dont want to jump on you true then i'm sorry, we look for stars .. they turn us on. Attitude is a right turn off and i wont meet a few couples either because of the same reason. Live and let live and make love not war... thats what swinging is about for us, not keeping us together (still crying laffing at that, true your a funny bloke)
[quote user=kcmanc]have you ever been in bed with a few women true, we're the selfish ones and we hog the bed and covers too.[/quote]
Ain't that the truth. I can't count the times I've had to drag the quilt back from Jeanne at night, and that's just one woman in the bed. God help me when we have two (wishful thinking !!!).
Seriously though, we've had a 3some with a single male and enjoyed it (our first meet, crapping bricks!!). The guy was Bi so we both got some enjoyment out of it as we would with a bi single female (Jeanne needs some female attention). However, due to endless mails from single males, we put "NO SINGLE MALES" on the profile as we'd rather get to know people in the chat room before taking things further. We get so many "your pictures really turn me on. wanna meet up some time and show me for real" messages it's unbelievable.
We never say never but we like to chose rather than feel pressured. Anyway, that's just our thoughts.
Carl and Jeanne xxx
I'll be honest with you true, Jeanne's looked at your profile and pics several times and after I kept picking her jaw up of the floor I can honestly say that she would be interested, but your age is the problem. You're just a couple of years older than her son and she just couldn't with someone that young.
Carl
[color="darkred"][quote user=truescorpio]I'll ask a simple question, as it appears that most people eager to disagree with me are either couples who havent any idea how hard it is for single males, and single males who have been here so long they've grown accustomed to rejection and have dropped their standards accordingly.
Would you swap places with me?[/quote]
You know what, I really don't think it is that hard for single males in here. Especially the ones that have a good attitude and don't have a delluded idea of what they are going to get out of this site.
We've met some great guys from this site and had some fantastic times doing so. Not once have I ever seen one of them in this forum complaining about how hard done by they are or how selfish, mean and nasty couples are in here.
And as far as success goes you haven't really done that badly compared to most. It's beyond me why you feel you need to complain?!
[quote user=truescorpio]It seperates the wheat from the chaff - those who find me intimidating or offensive are ones who I wouldnt be interested in meeting in the first place. And I have to say, I'm getting good at spotting these types beforehand[/quote]
Offensive? Yes sometimes!
Intimidating? You wish!
Would we want to swap places with you? No! not in a million years! It's not a simple question it's a stupid one![/color]
[color="darkred"][quote user=kcmanc] If i dont want to jump on you true then i'm sorry, we look for stars .. they turn us on. [/quote]
Oooh oooh weve got a star?????????????? lol :bounce::bounce:
Well said Kc :clap:[/color]
True asked 'would you want to swap places with me?'
My answer is, 'no I wouldn't'. But, there are many other single men I would happily trade places with. I would mention a few names but their heads might swell (not that head....such dirty minds :crazy: )
As to why, I think everything has been said in here that needs to be said - by single men, single women, and couples (:angel: kc ).
And True, as we both know, you could have changed your colour by now if you had shown some respect.
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I share your frustration sometimes, but I've found that by chatting to couples and getting to know them well in chat, an awful lot actually ARE prepared to meet SMs that they know and trust - they just don't want to be killed in the rush of idiots looking for a quick shag (and little else) if they advertised for SMs in their profiles. To be honest, I can't say I blame them !
:giggle:
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